Wednesday, July 27, 2011

I'm Gonna Love You Through It



I came across this song today and have been crying ever since. I immediately thought of Eric. He has been through it all with me and has never once tried to leave... even when I've asked him to. He promised he'd stay by my side and that's where he's been every single day since. I haven't made it easy. I have had every single emotion a person can have during this time... scared, tired, relieved, happy, sad, angry, devastated, strong, thankful.

I'm just a few days away from my final treatment and it's more emotional for me than I imagined it would be. It's been almost nine months since this all started... the day I received the phone call that changed my life forever. All those emotions are hitting me all at once as this is all coming to an end.

I'm beginning to wonder what my life will be like after cancer. My life has changed and I feel myself continuing to change. I keep saying "I want my normal life back". The truth is... I'm not sure what that is anymore. I'm looking forward to finding my new "normal". So, everyday from this point on, I'm going to live my life wide open to new possibilities. I'm going to open my mind to the lessons I need to learn after cancer. Life is a precious gift and I'm going try and live every single day thankful I'm here living in the moment, not looking back.

6 comments:

  1. Every time I read one of your posts it makes me realize how much I LOVE YOU!!! lol You are such an amazing person and I am so glad that every thing is almost over for you and I cant wait for you to start a new adventure again. I know I say this to much but you are such an inspiration to me and you make me realize that I need to live my life to the fullest just like your doing!! <3 Lynsey

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  2. I've known Eric a long time, and I'm not surprised at all. He's a good man. Great to hear about your progress. Love is pretty powerful stuff. Along with everything else, it can help kick cancer's ass.

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  3. As more time passes you will understand the normal you once knew is not the normal you live with now. There have been so many changes both to your body physically also emotionally and spiritually. It's OK to question get mad feel sad and in the next breath feel happy. This is a club we didn't ask to join, we were put here. What I see in your photos is a beautiful young mother who is loved. What could be better than that? It does feel like we are on a never ending roller coaster at times. My dear one day at a time...... Love Alli xx

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  4. FORWARD, is a good direction...You have proven that you CAN accomplish anything you put your mind to...LIVE WELL, LAUGH OFTEN, LOVE MUCH...that's what I say...and you are very good at doing all of those! You are truly loved by so many...keep smiling..IT's BEAUTIFUL and so are YOU!!

    Love, Mom

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  5. Margie, My name is Daphne. I am turning 43 this year and am proud of every minute of those years. You see, I was diagnosed for the first time at the age of 26 when all three of my babies were under the age of 8. After battling and winning, then battling and winning, I was diagnosed once more 2 years ago and am cancer free once more. I tell you this because I want you to know that your courage and the love of life that shows on your face in every picture give everyone around you, including me hope! You see, you, me, and those like us are what my husband calls CAN-servivors! Your husband, children, family, and friends are blessed to know you. Thank you for sharing your experience. Know you are in my thoughts and prayers!

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